...before You, all things melt away into irrelevance. You are the only eternal.

In Men's Health (June 2009 edition):

"It has been said that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference.  For one final momeny, our eyes locked together.  Mine continued to burn with devotion and enmity.  But Julia's eyes looked back at mine with neither pity nor pique, just something close to absolute disregard.  In that horrible instant, I had my first hope that one day I could join her there."

I was waiting for my friend at Borders' Coffee Club outlet so I got myself a nice pot of darjeeling and went through my readings.  The pair next to me were having a clearly audible conversation so I couldn't help overhearing snippets even though I was trying hard to focus on my work.  The guy, who came across somewhat as rather opinionated, was complaining about how it was impossible to pick up a Singaporean girl.  He had had success picking up girls overseas before, he said, and so his conclusion was that Singaporean girls were hard to pick up.

He wasn't so much trying to diss Singaporean girls as making an observation, so that is cool.  I can't remember what his companion said in defence of her comrades because I started thinking, "So why are Singaporean women so hard to pick up?" - current blogger included.

1. "You're not good-looking enough."  Of course she would be saying that internally - unless she's a queen bitch and you *really* don't want to get to know her.  Let's be honest here: you're hitting on her because of her looks (unless you're making intelligent conversation on Machiavelli because she's reading "The Prince") so you can't fault her for also being superficial.  I mean really, what else can she tell about you other than the physical cues.  Unless you're wearing a Beatles t-shirt then sweetie you've just become the most interesting person in the room.

2. The other thing is social norms.  In Singapore, the only random strangers that ever hit on me are Caucasians, creepy Singaporeans and sleazy guys in bars, none of whom have been in the least desirable.  Desirable Singaporean men never hit on female strangers.  If you're Singaporean Asian man trying to hit on a chick, you immediately fall into the latter two categories.  Sorry man, you only have your brethren to blame.  If anyone tried to speak to me overseas, I'd put it down to friendliness.  But just not in Singapore.

3. It depends on the setting.  He spoke of picking girls up in bars overseas.  I'm sure he's just raising that as an instance but it's probably easier to pick up girls in bars than on the streets.  Or maybe he's just comparing girls in bars overseas and girls in bars in Singapore.  In which case, see ＃2 on "sleazy guys in bars".

4. She's shooting to kill.  If you're not boyfriend material, she has no time for you.  I'm guilty as charged.  If you're not white-collar, do not have a tertiary education, I will assume that you're not my type.  Which may not always be true because people don't have to all go down the same beaten path as me to be a decent, interesting bloke.  But, dear Stranger, I have neither time to find out in the short duration that our paths cross nor the incentive.  So if you're a really wonderful person - which I'll never know - I admit that it's my loss.

I can't think of any other reasons at the moment.  I'm sure some people are thinking that Singaporean girls are hard to pick up because they're too full of themselves.  I'd beg to differ.  Maybe some are but you can't generalise like that without being unfair to other women who aren't like that at all.  I used to chat with random strangers who came up to me because I've always thought, "Well, never hurt anyone to be friendly, right?"  Well, not exactly.  I've stopped because (a) they're usually not very interesting to talk to because they are too busy trying to be slick (and get my number) to be interesting, (b) I don't have the time for them, (c) they're obviously not just looking for a friend (I later got a text from a guy that said, "I wish I had more time to charm you - hope to meet up with you soon" which just pushed him from the category of "friendly" to "greasy") and (d) too many of them are creeps (like Stalker Guy).

Let me know if you can think of any other reasons.

In Singapore, retail staff have a funny idea of what customers want.  In addition to spending more than I should on clothes (mostly from Zara) and shoes (I'm an Aldo girl), here's another attempt to boost the retail industry amidst the gloomy economy.

1. Do not follow me around the shop.  You're not conveying attentiveness.  You're just being plain annoying.

2. Do not adjust every single thing I touch.  You're not being on the ball.  You're sending the signal that I am not worthy of touching your merchandise and insinuating that I probably can't afford it.  Unless you're Christian Dior/Prada/DVF/Bally - because then you'd be right. *cue slinking out with tail between legs*

3. Do not greet me if you don't want to.  Taking a leaf out of the Japanese book, local retail staff have (probably under instruction from the bosses) started the culture of greeting customers.  And by greeting, I mean saying "Welcome" in a tired, flat voice that conveys anything but welcome and a sore lack of eye-contact that rubs it further in my face that you wish people would stop coming in so you wouldn't have to expend the energy to utter those two syllables.  And maybe turning your back to me just as I smile and turn to look at you in reciprocation.  Gee, I feel really welcomed.

4. Do not say bye to me when I step out of the shop.  Because then I feel obliged to twist my head back and smile to acknowledge your (luke)warm au revoir.  It's not worth my effort, really and seriously, I know you don't want to say "goodbye, please come again" any more than I want to turn back because it was already hard enough with the two syllables earlier and you're probably cheesed off that I didn't even buy anything.

5. Just because I touch the dress doesn't mean you have to be such a jack-in-the-box about getting me to try it.  Please see ＃1.  If you are close enough to tell me "you can try the dress if you want" (yes, I know that already, I saw the fitting rooms and no, I do not want to), you're too close.  Just back off a little because I was about to put the damned dress back on the rack.

6. Do not recommend me anything if you don't have a finger on what I want.  I only said "I'm looking for something suitable for the office".  I don't think I said, "I want anything that you have that is suitable for the office".  If I pick out the dress and put it back on the rack, it means the dress isn't good enough for my money.  It is not a cue for you to start pushing (yes that's what you're doing you dress peddlar!) other dresses to me.

7.  Which brings me to: I know what I want.  So let me look around the shop.  If I see anything I like that I'd like to try, I'll smile politely to get your help.

8. I'd much rather you didn't ask me if the clothes fit or if they were "okay" while I am still changing.  Especially if I'm still trying to get into the clothes.  It's not really annoying - just that seriously, the clothes may fit and yes they may be okay but I'm still not buying it because it's not pretty enough/not flattering enough/more expensive than it should be/beyond my budget.  Just wait til I'm out to ask "how is it".

9. I'll ask you if I need your opinion.  The retail chains commonly found in the heartlander shopping malls are usually the most guilty of this.  They refuse to install mirrors in the changing cubicles probably because (a) they save money and (b) that way the customers have to come out and that's when the retail assistants (usually aunties) start their coo-ing routine in a bid to separate you from your money.  It doesn't work that way.  You may think I look wonderful in the clothes but I don't.

The problem with these chains is that the materials are usually cheap - that's why the clothes can be priced so affordably.  But that doesn't appeal to me.  I'm more willing to pay double that and get something with a better fabric and a better overall look.  I know Zara isn't like haute couture but I have my bottomline (and I'm not talking VPL here).

And the thing is, I know that the praise isn't genuine.  They say it with the glibness of a snake-oil salesman, the smooth delivery of rehearsed lines.  That plus the fact that the clothes do look as cheapskate as they are.  What customers are looking for is genuine feedback.  One of my favourite dresses (which my mom and some of my friends have ooh-ahh-ed over) was a last-remaining sale piece from Warehouse.  I was unsure if it was suitable for me.  It was short, umpire cut and wasn't figure hugging like most of my dresses.  So I turned to the retail staff (who had hitherto been watching without comment) for her opinion and she was like, "Yah, I think it looks very nice on you!" And I bought it immediately.

10. Stop stating the obvious.  This one is a pet peeve of a colleague of mine who happens to be very slim.  So most of the clothes out there are too big for her.  And so the retail staff would be like, "Wah, miss.  You are very skinny hor.  What a pity, the clothes too big for you."  (The following is what goes through her head.) Yes, she knows already that she is slim, thank you very much.  And it's not a pity because it's your shop's fault for not having things in her size.  Me, I get the "Miss, you very tall hor.  Never go and be model ah?"  Hah!

And so that's the top 10 gripes I have with the retail industry.  What's yours?

Today I cried.

 

I cried because I was moved by the idea that people could come together, united by the same passion for music, for sports.  The idea that it didn’t matter where we came from: the only thing that mattered was that we came.  I cried because it felt so right in a world where there is so much hate.

 

I cried because you made me feel small. Your cynicism was a mockery of my passion, a slap in the face of hope. I couldn’t stop the tears that welled up because I was afraid of a world of ugliness.  The thought that maybe beauty only existed in the eye of the beholder made me feel miserable.

 

And I couldn’t explain that to you.

After the awesome-ness of the first Transformers movie, Transformers 2 came as quite a disappointment.

For one, its storyline lacked the simplicity of its predecessor.  All I want to see are fights, don't give me any of that Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade or Da Vinci Code sort of puzzles. This is an action movie, not a thriller.

And what really spoils a movie for me are "cop outs": unrealistic plot twists that make you go "Whuuuuut? They can do that?" Like Jetfire dramatically giving his parts to Optimus Prime so that he could become this super fighting machine and despatch The Fallen faster than you can say "whoa!"  Or how the Matrix of Leadership miraculously reformed itself from dust.  How the bodies of the Primes were hidden behind the fresco?  Not cool.

Most cringe-inducing moment of the movie must be the "I have died and gone to heaven" moment where Sam met the Primes.  "We have been watching you..." Creepy much?

The best parts of the movie?  The wisecracking.  The gem amidst the pig swill?  Agent Simmons.  "Don't tell my mother what you're about to see"?  Funny.  "One man, betrayed by the country he loves"?  Hilarious.  Repeated?  Double the laughs. The roommate was not too bad as the side-show comic.

Megan Fox is still as hot as ever. *drool*

Rating: 2/5 (Sorry, no love for you)

How difficult is it to get a MaxMobile subscription with Starhub? Apparently, very difficult. Because even after jumping through several hoops, calling the Starhub folks many times (more often than I call home!), being put on hold countless times, given wrong info and going online to submit my application, more than a week later, I’m still sans that awesome white USB thingum that gives me uninterrupted mobile Internet access on-the-go. Or at the closest Starbucks I choose to park my ass at.

To add insult to injury: not only am I still MaxMobile-less, I’m told my application for the plan that allows me to surf on my handphone is “being processed”.

Whuuuuut? Hello. I didn’t even apply for that!

I WANT MY MAXMOBILE NOW.

Only just that I have to wait another 24 to 48 hours for some bloke to call me back even though I’m already irate.

How difficult is it to get a MaxMobile subscription? No, don’t answer that.

An ugly turn of events

Zul Othman, TODAY

April 24, 2009

…Despite this, honorary treasurer Maureen Ong denied allegations that their concerns about Aware’s direction had anything to do with their religious beliefs.

“I’m not afraid to say I’m a conservative person. I go to church yes, but that … is personal. I did not go to Aware to push my religious beliefs, I went to Aware because I was concerned (as a parent) with what’s happening.”


I can believe that she genuinely thinks that she’s not going to AWARE to push her religious beliefs, whatever that vague statement means.

But every fibre of me revolts against her suggestion that she joined AWARE because she was merely “concerned as a parent with what was happening”, as though religion played no part in it.

The implied contrast is a false contrast that downplays the central role of Abrahamic religions in the lives of their believers. Religion provides a prism through which to see the world and guides the believer on how to differentiate right from wrong, make decisions and behave. Her concern stems from the fact that she is a Christian – because her religion tells her that she ought to be concerned that AWARE seemed to be pushing a homosexual agenda. A true Christian cannot compartmentalise the “religious” and “secular” parts of himself/herself.

I don’t seem to recall AWARE’s homosexual agenda. Not that I doubt that the new guard is telling the truth. But I do remember AWARE for their “wedding ring” campaign highlighting marriage rape and the legal loophole. I’m more inclined to think that AWARE had a liberal agenda, which included a belief in the freedom from oppression.

Maybe it’s the media bias – but I find myself repulsed by the coup-like nature of the leadership change. It’s unfortunate that Ms Josie Lau’s family has received threats. That kind of behaviour is disgraceful. But that does not change the fact that they are bringing a conservative agenda to the table and it is worrying.

Colleague to Mac Delivery guy: ...and two lattes, one without syrup.

MDG: And that would be without the coffee syrup or the sugar syrup.


*dugong-chng!*

A conversation at lunch during work reminded me of this:

Like totally for sure
I even got my manicure
The sun, I swear, is bleaching up my hair
Red, purple, yellow, green
What's the colour of my team?
I don't know, I don't care
How should I do my hair?
Go, go, fight, fight
Gee I hope I look all right.
Like go, like go, like go team yeah wooh!

Ah, school.  :)

My friend is now famous on (Razor) TV.

Lisa: Josieeeeee
its cheesy isnt it =D

Me: hahahahaha
it's so bad

Lisa: my bro is like, "u better lie low for the next few days"

me: hehehe how did you get suckered into this?

Lisa: they called me and i said yes?
i didnt know at the time it wld be live
i thought we wld have some time to record and organise everything
but WE DIDN'T

me: lol what went thru your mind when you realised?

Lisa: aft the initial feeling of blind panic u mean?
haha

me: hahahahahahahahaha

Lisa: i adopted the Spartan mentality of "if i have to die, ill try to at least die with honour!!!!"
i think i managed to leave with my dignity intact (more or less)

me: yes but what happens afterrrr...hmm?

Lisa: my consolation in this whole thing is
"no one really watches razor tv"
lol

me: hahahahahahahahaha

Lisa: which is why i even agreed in the first place

me: Yeah but what if you become famous
and someone digs this up?
didchya ever think of that?

Lisa: if u've noticed every celeb has some stupid video of them lurking somewhere =p
for gdness sake, George Clooney was in Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
it doesnt get much worse than that

me: true that
well, you'll live it down
if the MDA folks did

Lisa: its not like i have a sex tape circulating or sth

me: i'm sure you will

Lisa: have a sex tape??
LOL

me: LOL
hahaha the timing!

Lisa: i know! this conversation is a classic!

Part I

I’ve cut you out because I don’t think it’s worth it to care about your life anymore. Your bitchiness was uncalled for and I don’t see why I should place myself in the position where I may be on the receiving end of it again.

Part II

You took time to say a kind word to me even though you were in a rush. You have no idea how grateful I am for the comfort that brought.

Part III

I feel isolated sometimes.

Maybe I (think?) I don't need marriage because I have so little faith in it. What makes me think I'll be any happier?

One of the best things I've ever gotten were given out of what little the giver had: that made me feel so loved.

It is also wonderful when someone gives me an accessory that I absolutely love because (i) I'm a bitch to shop for and (ii) I don't even really love accessories.

But even though some presents are equal, I love some more than others because of the giver. Otherwise, the best presents would always be from my parents.

I am sick and tired of Singaporeans complaining. Very often, they complain when they don't get what they want, without seeing the big picture. I'm also sick and tired of those netizens who put people down just because they feel (operative word here) they have been wronged. Or simply because they can - because really, the issue doesn't even concern them. But there's like a brotherhood of victimism out there amongst some circles. Someone says "look, the government is not addressing our concerns" and everyone's like "yeah, them stupid ministers, them stupid civil servants, what are they paid so much for?"

Yes, I'm a civil servant. I do my job the best I can. If you think you can do my job better, feel free to take it from me. But I'm warning you, one of the job hazards is getting flamed by people who don't even understand (i) that you don't make the decisions; (ii) your job or (iii) the considerations.

I'm in the office now, eating vegetables and tuna out of the can. I swear that when I open up a can of tuna at home, my cat looks at me and gives me the "why are you eating my food?" look.

This has to be one of the best animation movies I've watched.

The freshness of a story about a young love discovered left a bittersweet taste when it turned out to be a love discovered too late. It's also Makoto's coming of age story, when she loses her childish obstinance and realises that friends can be more than friends after all. And what made the story so amazing was that science fiction was woven in so effortlessly and naturally into the story, a thread running through the entire narrative but barely felt at all.

The ending left a poignant sense of love lost which was found and left lingering. On one level, I wish it could have been a happy ending but on another level, it couldn't have ended more beautifully.

I just finished my first paper today and boy did I work myself into a state yesterday night, worrying that I wouldn't do well. It didn't go as badly as I thought it might, so I'll cross my fingers til 23 Dec.

I waited an entire year for the Singapore German Film Festival to be back and I caught the first of three that I will be catching this season on 8 Nov. Leroy, a mild-mannered African German, has fallen in love with a beautiful Caucasian German girl, Eva. Things quickly take a comical turn when he finds out that Eva's brothers are skinheads. All 5 of them.

Leroy (who sports a ridiculously conspicuous Afro hairstyle) must negotiate his identity and keep their relationship alive against all odds. When Leroy is attacked by a bunch of skinheads (an attack instigated by Eva's brothers) and Eva lands herself in hospital trying to defend Leroy, their relationship takes a turn for the worst.

The movie features cute thought-bubbles (like seriously) and witty exchanges that made me laugh a whole lot. A sweet, cute movie worth watching.

Rating: 4 out of 5

You know what's the most awesome thing? I have an awesome holiday coming up and I'm not even counting down to it.

This must be the most stressful week I've had. Major event on Thursday, Spokesperson A hosts journalists, important event on Saturday, sign language test on Sunday (think I aced it!), event on Tuesday morning, event on Wednesday morning and interview with Spokesperson B (in Mandarin - thanks a bunch) on Thursday. In between that, I've had to:

- Do my essays for my NTU courses
- Arrange for another event
- Study for sign language test
- See the doctor

But I'm not going to admit defeat. I'm going to keep on going.